episode 74: there is no such thing as a shortcut

Listen to this episode here. Transcript below:

As we’re heading into the very end of the year, I wanted to address an issue that tends to come up around this time.  The start of a new calendar year often gets spun as an opportunity for a new start, and frequently, a lot of us think about “getting through the holidays” and then starting a new discipline or a new fitness regimen or some kind of new resolution on January 1.  And believe me, advertisers KNOW this about human nature, so at this time of the year in particular, you’ll start to see all kinds of things marketed to us about new beginnings, new starts, and the one thing that will magically jump start your new year in a better direction.

I’m not in any way saying we shouldn’t make resolutions or decide on a date to start something new, or to try to buckle down and pursue a new goal.  What I have issue with is the spin that’s present with marketing.  Everyone’s trying to sell you something, let’s be honest.  And, most of us want a big change to fall into place easily.  So, you combine those two things - getting to a new place in life with a minimal amount of work and boom - that amounts to big sales for companies, right?

In this podcast, I’m dedicated to giving you REAL advice for things that actually work, not just quick fixes.  And in this particular episode, I’m addressing this phenomenon by telling you straight out - there are absolutely ZERO shortcuts when it comes to making progress in your life.  Whether that’s the goal of a new career, improving your health and fitness, working toward eliminating debt in your financial life, or even in the realm of marriage and relationships, we’re doing ourselves a huge disservice by getting distracted by the promise of magical quick fixes.  When it comes down to it, ANYTHING worth doing requires hard work and discipline.  It’s literally that simple.

My husband and I were just talking about this yesterday over our morning coffee.  If you’ve listened to the podcast for any length of time, you’ll know that I’m very much into athletics - I’ve been a distance runner for more than 30 years, an ultra runner now for nearly 16, and about 3 or 4 years ago I also got into real deal HEAVY strength training.  And if you follow my Instagram page, you’ll see a profile picture there where I look - well, pretty damn fit, especially considering the fact that I’m in my mid-40s.  Here’s the truth though.  To get into shape for that photo, I was training well over 2 hours a day, 6 days a week, doing heavy heavy lifting and minimal cardio, and I was tracking every single bit of food I put into my mouth for the 12 weeks prior to that photo shoot.  Now, I was working with a real deal bodybuilding coach, who was supervising everything I did, and she was awesome…but let me tell you, 3 months of eating lean protein, minimal carbs and calories, and basically very little fat was…awwwwwful.  Then I had to take some herbal diuretics immediately prior to that photo shoot; I worked with a pro fitness photographer who is an absolute master of lighting, and he greased up my abs before the shoot.  It took a LOT to get that photo in question.  Like, a LOT of work.

And here’s the thing - even with all of that work, even with my background in ultra distance endurance sports (look, I’m highly highly trained with a HUGE fitness base), I STILL didn’t look like these well known fitness influencers out there online.  This was the topic of conversation with my hubby…we were discussing how incredibly misleading fitness influencers online are, and how damaging that is.  I mean seriously, I see ads from completely ripped women with chiseled abs and muscle striations marketing online programs lasting for maybe 8 weeks with just bands - not even dumbbells - telling other women, just buy my program and that’s how I got to look this way.  Ummm, no, it’s not.  Someone’s lying here.  Your average layperson with no experience in fitness may not know what’s possible and what’s not - but for someone like me with a background in athletics, I’ll tell you this - the only way that fitness influencer got to look that way was likely due to 1 not eating much and strictly controlling her diet, 2 training like crazy for hours a day and 3 hate to say it, but steroid use.  If you know what you’re looking for, you can spot steroid use a MILE away.  But again, the average layperson doesn’t know this.

OK, so this isn’t a fitness podcast, but I’m telling you this to illustrate a point.  And that is this - if you’re someone who regularly listens to podcasts about self-improvement, you’re going to hear perfect analogies to this.  Anyone who tells you that self improvement is a simple fix is absolutely full of it.  I mean, I’ve seen these “steps to manifestation” videos all over Instagram and TikTok.  Speaking as a business owner and lifelong self-employed artist, no amount of magical vision boarding or affirmations or journaling or buying of online courses is going to substitute for digging deep, staying disciplined and simply working hard.

In short, there are no shortcuts.

I’m not saying this to be a Debbie Downer, but again, my podcast is about real practical advice, and at this particular time of year when folks start thinking about new year’s resolutions, my goal is to empower you and to help you avoid falling into this magical thinking pothole.  Leveling up in your life is ALWAYS going to require hard work, day after day.  And success at whatever you may be pursuing - a healthy marriage, a fitness goal, or a career aspiration - it never happens overnight.  Not for anyone.  Truly, when it comes to leveling up, it’s all about slow, steady and incremental progress.

So what are some ways we can level up in life?  What are some practical methods that will help us avoid magical thinking pitfalls and distractions?  Let’s explore some of these for the rest of this episode.

One - outline goals, writing them down, and give yourself a huge amount of runway.  By this, I mean journal out some CLEAR concise goals for yourself on paper and set down some dates by which you’d like to achieve these - YEARS, not weeks, in advance.  You may think you’re clear on what you want, but take the time and do this exercise.  Spend several days in silence really discerning and distilling down to what you actually want.  Think about what you might want your life to look like in 5 to 10 years from now, not 5 to 10 weeks from now.  Then, once you have a vision, then write all this stuff down.  It can be in a journal, a regular notebook - for me, I have stuff written down on post-it notes that are on my mirror and I look at these daily.  Take the time to get clear and be as specific as possible.

Two - take one step each and every day toward your goal.  Now, how do you do that?  OK, what I want you to do is to think of yourself every day and picture yourself every day as already having achieved what you want, even if you’re nowhere close to having it.  How would THAT person act or behave?  Let’s say you have a fitness goal.  You want to go from coach potato to marathon runner, for example, and you’ve never run a mile before let alone 26.  OK, think of yourself as an athlete already, even if you don’t have that experience.  When faced with some extra time in your day, would an athlete watch Netflix or would that athlete go out and maybe get in a few extra steps on a walk?  Would that athlete choose to eat processed food crap or whole foods, like a salad with lots of greens and protein?  Put yourself in the mindset of someone who’s already achieved what you want, and you’ll find you’ll start to make baby steps every day when it comes to choices.  Those small decisions, in time, add up to big changes.  And no, it’s not going to happen overnight!  Going back to the marathon example?  Hey, it took me two solid years of training to get to the point of running a marathon comfortably.

Three - be patient with yourself.  If you’re going to do some affirmations, one should include something like this: this is going to take time, and every second is going to be worth it in the end.  Additionally, don’t compare your journey to someone else’s.  You can’t - and I’ve talked about this in prior episodes, you’ve gotta run your own race and you can’t compare your timeline to another person’s because you have different brains, different bodies, different families of origin, and you’re just different people period.  Anyone who tells you that you’re going to magically transform to X degree in X amount of time is trying to sell you something.  You have to resolve yourself to the fact that your journey is going to simply take as long as it needs to, because it’s yours and yours alone.

Four - celebrate your milestones, big and small.  Set up monthly check ins with yourself.  What did you accomplish?  What small changes did you make?  Go back, look at that initial list of goals you made in step one - how much progress did you make?  If you made ANY progress at all, that is definitely cause of celebration.  Let yourself feel that success, let it sink in, even if you’re not to your goal yet.  Stick on this road, and in time, with continuing hard work, it’ll happen for you.  Keep it up, don’t give up, and stay focused on the long term, not the quick magical fixes.  You’ll get there.